Why do men choose other women? If you’ve been looking for love, you may have noticed that dating doesn’t look like it did 20 years ago. Or even 10 years ago. I remember a friend of mine trying online dating for the first time. At the time it was considered something only desperate people would do. Although a lot of people looked down on it. I thought it was great that she could meet someone in this way.
Online dating was a novel and a great way to meet a like-minded partner, someone who you’d normally never meet. That is unless you were lucky enough to randomly cross paths with them, which was unlikely. Fast forward a decade and online dating is now the norm. Most couples happily admit they met the love of their lives online.
In fact, a Pew Research Center study from this year shows that 5% of committed relationships and marriages. In the US started online. Another research conducted by eHarmony shows that 1 in 3 matrimony in the US begins online.
So why then do so many men choose other women for their love match. When technology is supposed to make it easier than ever to meet people?
We can blame technology for this because online dating has great advantages. It is true that it is not an entirely positive phenomenon. The online world has a disadvantage that affects not only online daters but also men and women. Women trying to find a partner in the most traditional way.
Choose other women
The big scary truth is; that there are three big reasons why finding love seems to be getting harder. These are opportunity, competition, and fantasy (otherwise known as delusion)!
There are three significant and insidious reasons why so many women feel as though every man they meet. That they actually like, keeps disappearing. Even when they thought they had a real connection with them. It seems that something always happens that has the man pulling away, and them. Second-guessing themselves and feeling disheartened (over and over again).
So let’s break this down further: Why men choose other women
- Opportunity – Not only do we have more opportunities to meet more men. But we’ve also got more choices of potential partners than ever before. But what happens when you have too many options? Oftentimes, having too many options to choose from can overwhelm and confuse. It’s like getting ready to go out – too many outfit choices can see you spending hours getting ready. But if you only had one or two choices. Then it would be easier and quicker to choose what looks best.
When you can easily communicate with and meet as many men as you like, you can become picky. You become paralyzed and powerless to decide who’s the most suitable match for you. And potentially never get together with any of them.
- Competition – There are more opportunities for you to meet men. So are there more opportunities for men to meet women? There is more competition than ever, not just among men but among women as well.
The world of romance has transformed into a buffet of options and, let’s face it, we’re all fallible. So this smorgasbord is making us greedy. This greed then leads to heightened expectations and it becomes increasingly difficult to stand out among your “competitors”. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, our little quirks and habits that make us unique. It’s getting harder and harder to make these stand out amidst so much criticism and competition.
It has grown really painful to draw the thought of one man. Just as it has turned difficult to concentrate your own concern on one man. But there is one more factor that prevents many of us from finding their match.
- Fantasy – We all have our fantasies in spite of our better judgment. We seek perfection even though we know there is no such thing as a perfect, totally flawless man. The increase in the number of dating opportunities and the tougher competition unfortunately feed these fantasies. Causing us to pass up on good men in favor of someone who seems like the fantasy come true. But will never live up to this perfect image. This is a delusion that will keep you from love.
Getting to know
So what’s a woman to look at in this sophisticated dating situation? Here are a few tips you can adopt:
Get to experience yourself further than your men do not choose other women
Having to identify what you like, what you want, and what makes you happy is a very necessary first step. To a happy dating life and finding your life partner. If you know what you want. You are less likely to fall victim to that greed that causes mental and emotional paralysis. Making you incapable of picking a man from the multitudes online.
Don’t give up easily once you’ve identified what you want in a healthy loving relationship. The many dating opportunities may be a mixed blessing but a blessing it still is, don’t forget that. Just as you get confused about the men you meet, the guys feel the same. So don’t take something that looks like rejection as a personal representation of you. Also, you can afford not to settle for someone that you’re not really into. You’ve just got to dust yourself off and keep going. Don’t worry that you won’t have a better chance of finding a truly intimate and satisfying relationship. As long as your approach is realistic and flexible, you will have it.
Engage in real life.
Online dating is great, but nothing beats real face-to-face contact. Even video chat can’t give you this sense of direct communication. This opportunity to really get to know who you’re interested in and who’s interested in you. Direct contact in real life can help you get a clearer idea of whether a man piques your interest online. Actually, a man you can fall in love with. Secondly, get out of the house and meet more people: don’t rely on online dating, live passionately!
Be bold, approach men.
On the previous point, I suggest you get involved in life more. But if you don’t take the initiative to meet more people (i.e. men) when you go out, what’s the point? Unfortunately, women are still held back by social conventions that have no place in the 21st century. Have the courage to put aside your fears and outdated social conditioning and approach. A man you’re interested in instead of waiting for him to approach you. Imagine that he might be shy or a little afraid of you. Or maybe he just never had a chance to notice you. Why not give him this chance? Men most like confident women. Show him your talents and watch him be attracted to you.
Confidence in love is the only condition for you to attract the love you want. And your self-confidence and self-confidence cannot be ignored. Because loving yourself will make you stand out from the crowd and eliminate all unrealistic assumptions. Hopeful people are also rational people, which makes them resilient.
A woman who finds the love she wants stays open to love. Even if it’s hard for her to do so.
Do you want to know how to get attention and affection from the man you want that lasts a lifetime? Then have a look at this: